Maid of Honor Speech

Information provided:

I am the Maid of Honor in my brother’s wedding. I’d like to convey uniqueness of my situation, ie; older and therefore protective sister of the groom, Seth (I am 10yrs older). I was asked by my future sister-in-law, Karen, to be Maid of Honor.

Karen is genuinely kind to everyone she knows and meets and adored my children from the first day she met them. She likes to have a good time, is extremely easy going, and is always appreciative. I also want to discuss the lifelong friendships that she has developed since she was a little girl. Karen lost her dad due to cancer about a year before she met my brother and I would somehow like to make mention of her dad.

Seth is extremely compassionate, values his family, is very funny yet subtle, and is always himself.  I wanted to discuss the day Seth was born, 34 years ago and it’s still so clear in my mind! I was turning 10, just got home from a sleepover at my friend’s house and my dad said we are going to the hospital because mom is going to have the baby! When the nurse came out to let us know my brother was born, I suddenly felt myself sitting on top of the world! I was so thrilled, and felt like such a big shot! Then it was time to see him for the first time and we were looking through the glass of the nursery at my brand new baby brother who was a crinkled up, purple in color (nothing like I imagined). Growing up, Seth was always my biggest fan, when it came time for me to go to college he made a drawing of a picture of me hanging out the window of my dorm, and told us that he hoped the school would blow up so I wouldn't have to go! Because of my little brother, I learned to care for someone that you genuinely feel responsible for and not to do certain things like testing out your new bb gun on someone passing by the house! 

I want him to know how proud of him I am as his sister, and how thankful I am to have him as a brother and uncle to my kids! On that note, I had cancer when my children were babies, and Seth was a huge help to me and my husband, with our kids, and I also want to mention that without dwelling on my illness!



Good evening Ladies and Gentleman. I am so touched and honored to be standing up here, delivering this toast because being Karen's Maid of Honor is truly a special honor for me. As Seth's older sister, I have had more than just a brother-sister friendship with him, but a sense of responsibility and pride – which I know my husband feels as well. So tonight, we look on in excitement and love to watch our Seth become someone's husband. And I have the added enjoyment of standing by Karen as more than a Maid of Honor, but as a new sister. 

Since Karen first entered our lives three years ago, I have come to learn how dear Karen is in many people's lives. It's clear to see how loved and appreciated she is, watching her continue friendship that she forged since college, high school, and even childhood. But I know how easy it is to get addicted to Karen so I completely understand! The love she bestows on others does not go unnoticed and therefore she has a lot of people who care about her and will be there for her in good times and bad, as she is there for them. She is going to be an equally caring and loving wife to Seth, and I know that her dad is looking down on her today with pride, as he had always felt that Seth and Karen made a wonderful pair. 

Karen is indeed the perfect woman for Seth, and as his sister I am proud to say that Seth truly deserves perfection. He is compassionate, has a big heart, values his family, and is full of love. I know that Seth will keep Karen entertained and laughing during their lives together with his quick-witted subtle humor – and that Karen will laugh at his jokes even when they fall flat.

I still remember the day Seth was born. Even though it has been 34 years, that day is clear in my mind – from coming home from a sleepover at my friend's house to our trip to the hospital. And I remember that when the nurse came out to let us know my brother was born, I suddenly felt myself sitting on top of the world, feeling like the ultimate big shot. Then it was time to see him, and while my dad and grandparents looked on in amazement behind the glass, remarking on how perfect and adorable our new baby is, what I saw was crinkled up and a bit purple in color – this was not what I had expected my little brother to look like. Luckily, he grew into a much more handsome version of himself.

Seth has been a wonderful little brother. He has cheered me on in all that I do. When I was going away to college, he drew a picture of me hanging out of the window of my dorm, and told us that he hoped the school would blow up so I wouldn't have to go. Now that's what I call love.

Because of our age difference, Seth felt more than a brother but as someone I was responsible for, and I feel it prepared me well for having children of my own. It also taught me how to use a little brother to my advantage, getting him to clean my room for me when I was a lazy teenager. It also taught me the very important lesson of not testing our a new bb gun on someone passing by the house. That's a lesson I've never let go of. Yes, having Seth presented a lot of benefits. But one of the greatest benefits I received was in my time of need, during my cancer battle. My kids were very young, and having Seth around to help me and my husband with our children was a godsend. It is something I am forever grateful for. 

There is not enough time this evening or in a lifetime for me to explain all the ways my Seth and Karen have enriched my life, but I will say that I'm excited for them to enrich each other’s lives as husband and wife. I wish you both the very best that life has to offer and am excited for all that lies ahead.

<End with “Congratulations” or “To the happy couple” or “I love you guys” as you raise your glass to toast>

Birthday Poem

Information Provided:

We would like to read a poem for our good friend Justin. It’s his 30th Birthday and his wife planned a big party for him, expecting us – his college friends – to read something for the occasion. The birthday boy is Jewish, and thus he is having a Jewish themed birthday (his wife has a good sense of humor like that). We'd prefer the speech to be in rhyme and there are 5 of us reading it, so maybe a few lines for each of us? He and his friends all have a great sense of humor so we want this to be funny. Feel free to include "Jewish humor." Other things you should know is that he is a lawyer, he likes nice things (particularly nice watches), he's obviously married and has one very young child, he's very charming, and the ladies love his eyes (we tease him about it).



Ladies and gentlemen of the jury box, 
Stop smearing your cream cheese, put down the lox, 
Today is a day to dance the jive and the hora, 
The birthday of someone we all do ador-a.  
A marvelous man, friend to both poor and rich, 
But judging by the watch, we see he adores which,  
Though fine tastes abundant, a heart twice the size, 
Of Mother Theresa's, with much prettier eyes. 
A doting husband and spectacular dad, 
When he's not around, his friends are all sad, 
Unless he’s at work, fighting against crime, 
As long as he remembers to give us our time. 
And don't underestimate the power of his charm, 
His wit and his banter, almost a cause for alarm, 
For how can such brilliance be swept under the rug, 
Or how good this softy can give a big hug. 
We are blessed with his presence, that we cannot deny, 
And to treat this day normally, we cannot even try, 
So as written in the Torah, today we must say, 
Baruch Atah, comrads, its Justin’s birthday!

Farewell Party Poem

Information provided:

Our friend Tanaya is moving to London for a new job. She is a close friend from law school. We, her three best friends from law school, would like to do something special for her going away party. It is a big affair and we thought we could surprise her with a poem which we’d place at each seat at this dinner party. We’d like something with a bit of humor but also very touching. Perhaps something that speaks of her amazing journey. She has traveled all her life due to her father’s job. She was born in Bombay, raised in Poland, spent some time in London, then attended college at Colgate in upstate New York. Finally, she came down to Manhattan for law school which is where she met us, as well as her current fiancé. She was very social and we definitely had a lot of fun. Perhaps poking fun at the legal profession would be appropriate for this poem as well. Finally, we’d like to say something about her departure to London and about how we are always here in New York waiting for her.  



There once was a girl from Bombay, 
Who knew she had a lot to say, 
So she traveled the globe, 
With the undying hope, 
That she'd be a great lawyer one day. 
She once brought her travels to Poland, 
But saw that struggles for slavs had no end, 
So to London she skips, 
For some fish and some chips, 
And to make Prince Harry her best friend. 
The girl had become a bit restless, 
For Royal life can feel a bit endless, 
So to Colgate she fled, 
With full speed ahead, 
So her beer pong skills could become the bestest. 
But the cold of New York State made her moody, 
And she yearned to learn about landowners' duty, 
So to law school she went, 
Where the nerds are often sent, 
And the professors can be viscous and snooty. 
At law school she found her safe haven, 
With some cool chicas and a boy who's clean shaven, 
Three years went by fast, 
And somehow law school she passed, 
But not before becoming a social maven. 
But now plans for our singing girl group have been thwarted, 
As our dear friend's story is temporarily transported, 
For a fancy big firm year, 
With English luke-warm beer, 
Though we all know she's likely been deported. 
However our story does not end at this point, 
For she can find her friends at her favorite joint, 
In the U S of A, 
Where her heart will always stay, 
And our dear Tanaya’s not one to disappoint.